4- Insides

The Sabres were gearing up for practice at the HSBC, which Ryan Miller usually looked forward to. Today, however, he wasn't feeling up to goaltending- not because he didn't want to, simply because he didn't have the energy.

"Rough night?" Thomas Vanek commented as Ryan yawned for the third time in a row as he strapped on his pads.

"Yeah…" Ryan replied, "Rough couple nights."

"Something on your mind?" Patrick Lalime asked, "Like…I dunno…a girl?"

Vanek whistled, "Yeah Ryan, it's been awhile. Forever, actually."

"Sort of…" Ryan said slowly, rubbing his temples with his thin fingers. The guilt from the night at Diesel was still weighing him down. One-night stands was not the kind of thing Ryan did, and it didn't help that it was how he'd lost his virginity. The way he acted, Ryan even fooled himself. He felt sick to his stomach to even think he could do something like that.

"Heard Crosby's sister-in-law was at the club the other night," Lalime said, breaking Ryan's melancholy thoughts, "Did you hook up with her? Or at least try?"

Drew Stafford laughed, "Five bucks says he didn't."

"Shut up, Staff," Ryan said, trying not to blush, "I said hey."

"You're always just saying hey," Vanek said, "He's been in love with this girl for three damn years-"

"I have not! The game is my first love." Ryan said, trying to sound tough.

Vanek snorted, "Come on, man."

"Yeah," Stafford continued, "We've seen the way you look for her whenever we play the Pens. You haven't been the same since you screwed up your ankle in Pittsburgh and SHE was the one who took care of you…"

Ryan clunked his mask down and grabbed his stick, "You guys can think what you want, but I've got a game to practice for."

Lalime exchanged glances with Vanek, who just shook his head.

Ryan passed Jason Pominville on his way out to the ice, who tapped Ryan's helmet with his stick. Ryan closed his eyes and hoped to God he could finish this practice without another taunting remark. It was only a matter of time before it would all catch up with him.

-

Anna clenched her fists, looking down at the floor. She could feel the eyes of Tyler Kennedy, Marc-Andre Fleury, Max Talbot and Daniel Briere boring into her, waiting. Daniel broke the silence.

"So what was so important you couldn't text it?"

Anna sighed and lifted her gaze. TK was tapping his fingers on his hip nervously. Max was gritting his teeth. Marc was the only one showing no signs of impatience; rather concern in his warm eyes.

"Guys…" she said slowly, "I'm…I'm pregnant."

"What?" TK gasped.

"Jesus." Max said under his breath, bringing a hand to his brow.

"I know you're gonna be really upset with me, and I respect that," Anna said quietly, "You guys are like my brothers, really, and I-"

"It is Ryan Miller's, yes?" Marc-Andre asked.

Anna glared at him suspiciously, "Excuse me?"

Marc's face flushed red, "Well, I, you…at Diesel, you left Veronique to go to the bar with Ryan, and we didn't see you the rest of the night-"

"Ok, ok, enough," Anna waved her hand in the air, "Yeah, I get it."

"Anna, is that true?" Max asked, arms crossed, "You had sex with Ryan at Diesel? And now you're pregnant?"

Anna grimaced, "When you say it like that it sounds like a crime."

"I knew it!" TK shouted, coming to a revelation, "I told you if you didn't tell him you had feelings for him you'd lose your mind and bang him and-"

Marc punched TK in the ribs and he whimpered.

"What is important is that you are taken care of here," Daniel spoke up, "How far along are you? Three months?"

"Yes," Anna replied, relieved and embarrassed at the same time, "I took two tests last night, just to be sure."

"So what are you going to do?" TK asked, "Are you going to get an abort-"

"NO," Anna said sternly, "I couldn't live with myself. That is not an option."

Max raised his eyebrows, but she ignored him.

"Ok then," Daniel said with a nod, "You'll want to go to a gynaecologist. A doctor first and foremost. Plus, prenatal vitamins are a good idea. Cecilia can tell you where we got hers and which brand was best."

"Cecilia? No, wait," Anna said quickly, "I don't want anyone to know about this."

"You just told us." Marc-Andre said a-matter-of-factly.

"Yes, and you're the only ones I've told so far," Anna replied, "Except for my sister, because she was there when I took the test. I don't want this circulating and everyone getting worried about me."

"Are you going to tell Ryan?"

Daniel's eyes seemed hopeful, but Anna shook her head, "No. I am going to do this on my own."

"You are not," Max reached out and touched her arm, "We're going to help you. We'll accompany you to your doctor's appointments, help with setting up a nursery, everything."

TK seemed floored, "We will?"

"Yes," Max said, "Because, like it or not, we love you, and you're not alone."

"I concur," Marc said with his trademark toothy smile, "We are here for you, Etoile."

Anna felt her cheeks burn with tears as Marc said his nickname for her, which was French for 'star'. Together the four boys engulfed her in a warm hug and she stopped herself from crying. The little child living within her was going to be born into a world of love, it seemed…with or without a father.

But Daniel Briere was determined to change all that.

-

Anna, to be put lightly, felt like she had been hit by a truck. She hung her head over the sink, splashing cold water on her face, in hopes it would make her feel somewhat better. Looking in the mirror, Anna saw a face she hardly recognized- a face ridden by lack of sleep and large amounts of sickness.

Cecilia, Daniel Briere's wife, had gone through large amounts of morning sickness when she was pregnant with their second child. Anna remembered Daniel worrying about it well. Anna had expected some amounts of throwing up, but she didn't expect to be hurling her guts all the time. It had even gotten to a point where she was lying awake at night for fear her stomach might explode out of pure randomness.

The worst part was that Anna had chosen to go through with everything without telling Dan Byslma. The last thing she wanted was another person worrying about her; between Max and TK it was getting ridiculous. She hated keeping secrets from Dan, but for the sake of the team she felt she had to.

Her insides were rotting, she thought.

Well, every inside except for that small one, which was only going to grow bigger.