34 - Pain

Anna walked through the doors of Vancouver General Hospital with a heavy mind. She had booked a last-minute flight as soon as she got off the phone with Irma, and she was heavily jet-lagged. Of course, she hadn't slept at all on the flight and waisted no time in leaving the airport and going straight to the hospital. She had to.

Anna walked to the sign-in desk and showed her Buffalo Sabres identity card, "Hi, I'm here to see Ryan Miller."

"Are you Anna?"

A man approached her from the nearby waiting room and Anna was taken aback. He looked like Ryan, but much younger. The same eyes, the same build- well, this guy was more buff, but Anna could tell somehow they were related.

"Yeah, Anna Evans."

"I'm Drew Miller," he motioned for her to follow him, "Ryan's brother."

"Is Ryan ok?" Anna asked him.

Drew clicked the button on the elevator, "He will be now that you've showed up."

Anna pursed her lips, "Excuse me?"

"He won't take any drugs for the pain," Drew explained as they stepped in the car, "Until he sees you."

Anna felt a lump in her throat, "How much pain is he in?"

Drew looked Anna in the eye, "More than he will admit."

Following Drew into Ryan's room, Anna saw an older man and woman sitting by the hospital bed. She instantly knew they were his parents. Anna swallowed and tried to be brave, and she finally looked at Ryan.

There was a huge wad of bandages wrapped around his neck. Ryan was sickly pale. His fists were white from clenching; his arms looking bonier than usual. He looked like he was one step into death, but for some reason he was holding on.

"Ryan..." Anna said breathily, "Oh my god, Ryan..."

Ryan's eyes opened slowly and wearily. He mouthed her name and lifted his hand shakily. Anna laced her hand in his and ran her thumb along his soothingly. He pointed to the corner of the room.

Anna nodded and turned to them, still holding Ryan's hand, "I'm Anna Evans. Ryan's girlfriend."

"It's nice to meet you, Anna," Mrs. Miller said, "I'm Elise Miller. I'm so sorry we had to meet this way..."

"And I'm Dean," Mr. Miller told her.

"I'm sorry, too," Anna replied, looking down at Ryan, "I'm really sorry..."

"Ryan never mentioned he had a girlfriend," Drew blurted out.

"Drew..." Elise began.

"Well he didn't," Drew stated, "Actually, I've never heard your name until now, and Ryan tells me everything."

"We've only been together a few months, and the Sabres have not been doing well lately," Anna said quickly, "That's probably why."

Drew scoffed and left the room. Anna felt Ryan squeeze her hand.

Dean spoke up, "Sorry, Anna, Drew's just a little shook up by this whole thing."

"I understand," Anna told him, "I have a younger sister and if anything happened to her, I'd be all strung out."

"Well, we're just thankful he made it," Dean said slowly, "It was the scariest phone call we've ever gotten. I imagine you feel the same."

Anna nodded, touching Ryan's cheek, "I sure do."

The next morning Ryan was transferred safely to a hospital in Buffalo. Lindy Ruff was able to meet Anna and the Millers halfway. There was no press allowed, which made Anna very happy. She never once left Ryan's side.

By the time Ryan was settled in his new bed in Buffalo, Anna felt like collapsing. She watched throughout the journey there as the freezing drugs wore off and Ryan whimpered in pain. She held his hand and promised to make it all go away. She reassured Elise that everything would be fine, while taking the time to talk to Dean. She didn't have to worry about Drew, since he refused to speak with her.

The Sabres continued on their road trip and Lindy returned in time for a game against the New Jersey Devils. Flowers came flying in from every NHL team, including the Toronto Maple Leafs. Anna was taking the time to arrange and rearrange the flowers in Ryan's room when Drew finally spoke to her.

"Can I talk to you in the hall for a minute?"

Anna shrugged, "Sure."

As she joined Drew in the hall, he crossed his arms and she felt nervous.

"Why did you lie to my parents?"

"What?"

"Don't play dumb," Drew said sternly, "I'd like to know why you didn't tell them you were pregnant."

Anna felt like she was caught red-handed, "How do you know I'm pregnant?"

"Your face is flushed, your skin has a glowy tinge, and of course, you're four months along. It's easy to tell."

"And how exactly can you tell?"

"I have three kids."

Anna was surprised, "Hmm. You're good."

"So tell me, is it Ryan's kid or someone else's?"

"It's Ryan's," Anna explained, "But please don't go telling everyone...it was an accident."

"Oh yeah? Sleeping with my brother and becoming his girlfriend shortly thereafter is an accident?"

"I am starting to see the family resemblance," Anna snorted, "But seriously, Drew. Ryan and I were both really drunk, and eventually we were at my house, and...long story short, I'm working for the Sabres and we're living together. We're trying to make this work. No, it wasn't in my life plan, I guess you could say, but..."

"Do you love Ryan?" Drew asked non-chalantly.

"What? NO! We're just close friends...and parents-to-be."

Drew rolled his eyes, "Right, then why did you show up in Vancouver so quickly?"

"Because...I care about him."

Drew sighed, "Fine. I'll take your word for it. But you both have to explain to my mom and dad that you're expecting a child together. I don't care how or when, but I want it to be soon. The Miller family doesn't like secrets."

One of the doctors tapped Drew on the shoulder, "We're going to remove the bandages now and inject the acetaminophen, because it cannot be swallowed. Would you like to be with him?"

Drew nodded, "I'll go. Give his woman a break."

To Anna's dismay, Ryan's vocal chords were starting to work again when they removed the bandages- the sounds of his screaming in pain was like torture to her. She felt the tears burning in her cheeks and she wanted to run away. But she couldn't leave him. This was a nightmare that she would have to endure.

Wrapping her arms around herself, Anna sobbed and slid down the wall to the floor. His pain was her pain. He was a part of her now, Anna realized, and as Ryan continued to wail in agony, she felt the baby kicking like crazy.

"Daddy's gonna be ok..." she whispered, "He'll be ok....